judgy net.

everyone doesn't enjoy being judged kan?

be it at work, when you have tried hard,
be it with family, who you tried caring for,
be it with friends, who you support.

but imagine getting judged by social apps.

if you notice, there's always these 'suggestions'
by social apps, and it's labelled as 'people like you',
'things that might interest you', 'you should follow', etc.

so, in my case, for 'people like you',
they've listed down complete strangers /
oghang rupe serabai gile / people who
have absolutely no indication of having
anything in common with you whatsoever.

for 'things that might interest you',
they've listed down crappy stuff like
gardening / automotive / banking.
well NO, all those things does NOT
interest me whatsoever either ok.

and for 'you should follow', they've
lsited down stuff like fitness / travel/
environmental groups. macam tau je
aku ni da gemok / ske dok umoh /
ske make fun of 'green' people.

bloody judgemental internet. hmmmph.

i am positive i have made amends.

sometimes we lose sight of our blessings kan?

there are days when we just feel dark and gloomy

and nothing is going our way and we just feel like
the whole universe is going against us in every sense.

so this is why it’s important not to lose sight of things.

now, i came across this concept of a positivity jar.
basically you set up a jar / box / container, write down
the positive thing(s) that has happened throughout
the day / week / month / lifetime, put it inside,
then take time to read it after it’s accumulated.

in the end, you have a realization that despite

gloomy days, there are plenty of small, everyday
things for us to be positive and thankful for!

 …and so we move on to me.

so i went around, asking my dear friends to write

stuff to include into my imaginary positivity box
(since they are at home and here i am on mars),
but they would hafta write theirs starting off with;
“…i am positive…………………”

and here are some of the (cleaned up language) results;

1. i am positive dot dot dot.

2. i am positive that i have weight issues. hahaha!

3. i am positive that this experiment is useful.

4. huh susah tu. tak bese la puji diri sendiri.

5. i am positive that i'll sell my car if there’s no parking.

6. ermmmmm.

7. jap, aku pikir dulu. remind aku nanti.

8. i am positive that i will strangle you next time.

9. i am positive that i am hot. hahaha!

10. aku tak positif arini sebab panas tade econ.

11. susah nih. apa ya? i am positive sometime? hahaha!

12. i am positive you’ll never ever setup an actual

positivity box.

13. i am positive that you are not going to get anything

positive from this box.

14. i am positive that my fren is racist.

15. i am positive that my friends are not as positive

as they think they are.

16. yer, aku believe ke kebolehan positip ko.

ehh awat idong aku jadik panjang nie…

17. nanti ah. kene tukar diaper anak. busuk ni.

 

18. i am positive....nottt.

 

19. i'm busy now. f&*^ positivity.

...aaaaaaaaand that tells you how lovely my friends are,

and how well they know me accurately as a person!
having said that, there WERE some actual positivity;

1. i am positive that i am getting married soon.

2. i am positive my kids will grow to be a better

person than their parents and live comfortably.

3. i am positive that i can be the best mother
to my kids cause they are no perfect mother
ever exist in the world.

4. i am positive that i can be positive about
people if i try hard enough.

5. i am positive. i will simply do enough, and

enough is what i can do within reasonable limits.

so there. i am positive that everyone had a laugh,

i am positive that they have made my day,
and i am positive that we’ll continue to be close.

credit Dear_S. your doodles are awesome.

even when i blame myself, the outcome feels the same.

an old fave, a lyrical posto
off "stars" by switchfoot.

pengertian of the day.

"...melengahkan solat adelah perbuatan syaitan..."

now, by using that piece of logic, it has dawned on me
that it's something that happens to me on a regular basis,
specially once dhur and asr comes along.

this is because time tu laaa ade-ade je koje yang mai ok.

so this means para colleagues aku adelah setan belake.

sekiantimekaseh.

tektik keji of the day.

in the past, it was difficult to get things done for you.

you hafta go meet the person and explain,

you hafta keep calling em to remind things,
and you hafta beg and grovel to get assistance.

nowadays it’s far easier to get things done.

…just threaten to unfriend them on social media.

kawe mu.

in business, there are different types of prices.

you have stuff with fixed prices,
you have stuff with negotiable prices,
you also have stuff with discounted prices.

...and there's rege kawan.

this roughly means, that not only do you go
below all fixed, negotiable and discounted,
but you are expected to give things away
for a price that is juuusssttt above free.
and in some cases, you even lose money.

simply bcos you're selling to someone
who you know from association / same kampong
/ pok sedare / kawan kepade mok sedare jaoh / etc.

so yes, expect this when dealing with oghang mayu.

...you have an obligation too, ok. sebagai kawe.

intro.

i realize now that i am an introvert.

yes, i need lotsa time to recharge and recuperate once i have gone out.

recharging and recuperating helps take the tiredness and stress away.

yes, i need lotsa quiet time and being around others is tiring for me.

i find loud people to be annoying. and they try too hard to be likable.

yes, i don’t need to have a zillion friends. a few good ones will do.

i trust them with my life, and vice versa. quality, not quantity see?

yes, i prefer to work alone. and i am very good at what i do.

it also means i enjoy being a small but important part of the team.

yes, taking time to have “new experiences” isn’t exciting for me at all.

i am happy with what i know, and comfortable with what i enjoy doing.

yes, i have no problem spending most of my time nicely at home.

this is why my home is nice and organized and usually clean.

yes, i communicate much better through writing than speaking.                      

unless the topic is interesting to me. then i can’t shut up for days.

so yes, i am an introvert.

…and i wouldn’t have it any other way.