more good things to come this year.

forged, or written in stone.

let's face it, any kind of love story is cringy.

it's cringy for us to write or share about,
it's cringy for others to read about,
it's just cringy for everybody involved.

however, behind every cringy love story,
there is always a larger truth;

it's honest, it's heartfelt, it's horribly embarrassing,
it's terrifying, it's painfully heartbreaking,
it can be a striking reminder, or a healing method,
or something for us to learn and grow from,
or something for us to cherish forever.

now, some of my favourite stories are the ones
with a hint of adversary, where people need to
overcome the odds in order to be together. or not.

don't get me wrong, i love a happy ending just like
any other person, but i also know for a fact that
sometimes happy endings just don't happen.

but the thing about sharing adversary or going through
traumatic experiences together, is that we learn that we
can open up to someone else unconditionally,
and that will always result in a feeling or relationship
that is forged in stone. regardless of the outcome.

so yup, any kind of love story is cringy,
especially the good ones.

...and that's what makes it all the more worthwhile.

the perks of going to the dentist.

how one looks after a dentist trip. yup, plus the mini mohawk.

so i went to the dentist a few months ago.

looking back, it was an intriguing experience,
simply because the last time i went was 150 years ago,
and it was the most meaningful human interaction
i had post-oman and pre-kl lockdown!

anyway, so here are some rather surprising perks i've found,
despite all the scary thoughts or stories about a dentist trip;

1. you find that the hole in your gum isn't what you thought.

2. you find out that you're lazy and bad in keeping teeth clean.

3. ms dentist was actually nice about it when explaining things
to you. quite frankly if i were the dentist, i'd say, "...brush your
teeth more than once a day, you chummy little slob!..."

4. no, i don't know what chummy means. or if it actually exists.

5. you get to be treated in a nicely decorated room. sure, perhaps
the colourful wall decorations are more meant to subdue the kids,
but i appreciate the happy emotions from it, regardless.

6. you start blabbing all sorts of nonsense when you're petrified.

7. now, the seating position. it tilts downwards. a LOT. now,
while i fully appreciate that this is the best way for ms dentist
to perform her duties, but quite frankly having your legs hoisted
up in the air while having your head towards the ground goes
against my preferred daily norm of sitting down. AND it certainly
doesn't assist when you're already petrified in the 1st place.

8. you find out that despite what ALL your friends say, it is
clinically proven that you DON'T have a big mouth. or jaw opening
more like it, but it's nice to prove all those bastards wrong!

9. i too, enjoy teaching my engineering "kids", so i can appreciate
people taking time to explain things and train assistants on the job.

10. as a reservoir engineer in surveillance, i can appreciate the concept of doing diagnostic tests and taking as much information as possible in order to build a full picture, before recommending options on how to proceed and what the pros and cons are. i can also appreciate that no matter how much you explain things to people, there are certain technical details that you simply cannot expect non-practitioners to understand and make a fully informed decision on. if it were me, i'd go; ",,,just do what i tell you.." MIC DROP.

11. anesthesia IS NO JOKE, PEOPLE! however, what IS a joke is,
it would be nice to inject it in the thigh of, say, usain bolt and
challenge him to a 100 m race. NOT SO FAST NOW YA? haha!

12. the notion of medical professionals of being higher levels of
patience vs the average person is likely very true. i've seen 1st hand
how ms dentist deals with people when things aren't going to plan
or when things aren't working or available as they should be.
quite frankly i would've managed the situation FAR worse than her.
and as certain ex-colleagues might attest to, i'm VERY sarcastic
and not pleasant to deal with at all when i'm pissed off haha!

13. HOWEVER, as someone who likes to observe people, you DO
wonder how that patience would affect them. i mean, as a human being, i'm sure they need to vent somehow, or hope that they channel that possible inner frustration in a good way. it does make you feel like asking ms dentist if she's ok, and offer to hear her vent if she needs to.

14. for any business or shop, never ever underestimate the importance
of having friendly people at reception. it could make someone's day.

15. also, never underestimate the importance of having seemingly
fashionable shades for the patients to wear. we appreciate looking good while having a huge light blasted in our face haha!

16. jazz-ish type songs isn't really my forte, i'm limited to a few norah jones and fiona apple songs, but i've learnt that they can actually be quite catchy!

17. certain dental procedures DO have massive side effects. like it
makes you grin non-stop for a few days for no reason, and it makes
you feel like digging up your old colgate club membership card!

so there. do yourself a big favour and go visit your local dentist, people! your gums will thank you for it in the long run, and who knows, maybe you'll just make a lovely new friend as well in the process!

till the next brush!

bahkan lebih dari itu.

the song recommendations have been on fire lately,
and here's another lyrical posto off the soothing
"lebih dari egoku" by mawar de jongh

definitely not sabrina.

how what we like looks like.

now, under normal circumstances, one would think that the 1st thing i would look for when the economy sector is restarted, is for me to check whether things like banks, law offices, postage, restaurants are re-opened.

...you know, the more important stuff.

but what did i actually look for? does this mean bookstores are back

...yup, that says a lot about my current mindset on priorities.

however, it also points out another thing; i love stories! i don't mind in what shape or form it comes in, (hardcopy) books are my favourite of course, but if it comes in the form of movies or (understandable) art, so be it.

but another form that i absolutely love is stories through blogs. i love the fact that people are still writing, sharing their stories or poems or just using the blog as an outlet to vent or to just blabber about random crap (like the one you're reading now).

i dunno, there's just something magical about words being articulated on a canvas.

anyway, recently came across a blog, and just by reading through, i found quite a lot of things to be super relatable; being a bit of a nerd, feeling sad and pouring your heart and soul in writing, bits and pieces of poetry, having other blogs previously but choosing to shift to another one for different reasons, feeling like what we've written isn't up to scratch and we could do better, feeling that tinge of guilt when we've "ignored" our blog for so long (god knows i haven't updated my tumblr blog for ages), going through heartbreak, trying and failing miserably, but having the guts to keep going, and believing in the idea of a soulmate.

it really is a nice feeling to know that there's other people out there who's journey feels oddly at ease with what you've actually gone through in the past.

so to everyone out there who finds the points above to be in parallel with your world, take it from me; sometimes it doesn't get better, and that's ok, because maybe it wasn't even meant to work out in the 1st place.

...but sometimes, just sometimes, it DOES.

now that, my friend, makes everything worth keep going on for.

always.

mars sniplets.

the sight. once upon a time.

well, what can i say? i've been on mars ever since i left oman 4 months ago.

some sniplets about my new life here on mars;

1. i've retired. or at least i'm trying to. more on this in a later post.

2. i miss daily human interaction. both from this lockdown and retirement.

3. i went to the dentist for the 1st time in 150 years. more on this later.

4. the pandemic has made us all feel how isolation feels like.

5. having more time on your hands doesn't necessarily equal more things get done.

6. this time last year i was dreaming of getting lots of malaysian food in the bazaars. yup, that STILL hasn't happened either.

7. i cry more now. both happy and sad tears. seems my heart has gotten softer.

8. the oil price went to negative in the states. never thought i'd live to see that.

9. i have a newfound respect and adoration for the medical community, authorities with sound technical and social judgement, and what the term "essential workers" actually means.

10. i realized that i have too much stuff. need to sell and / or donate after this. simplfy life.

11. i used to bemoan having little time to devour my books. i still haven't finished one.

12. i miss my omani family. they're idiots but i love them.

13. i feel the need to write again. there's things i wanna say. lots of crap, in fact.

..i'm back, i guess.

what if nothing ever will change.

another lyrical posto, pure vocal talent, this person.
it's off "hard place" by H.E.R.
go check her out!

i got issues. and one of them is how bad i need you.

so i've just been blown away by julia michael's
live performance of 'issues' on the jimmy fallon show.
so here's a modified lyrical posto.